Three Little Lies Page 12

  Karina was invited too, this time. She tried to be all laid-back about it, but I could tell she was excited. She came over to mine beforehand and we got ready together. She was full of it: who was going to be there, what boys from our class had been invited, would Leo Smith come and if he did would he try and get off with Sasha or did she have a chance, what the two brothers would be like, if either of them would fancy her. She went on and on until I felt like screaming at her to shut up. I couldn’t help thinking of Sasha, and how much cooler and funnier she was than Karina. Karina was so desperate.

  When we got there, Daniel opened the door to us. He looked blank for a minute, and then recognised me.

  ‘Oh, hi. Sasha’s friend. Ellen, isn’t it? Come in.’ He stood back as we passed, Karina squeezing unnecessarily close to him.

  ‘Hi, I’m Karina,’ she said, holding out her hand.

  It was so weird. I mean, who shakes hands apart from old people? Daniel took it, though, and bent low over it, kissing it lightly.

  ‘Enchanted,’ he said in a pretend posh voice.

  Karina was simpering away, pink with delight. Didn’t she know he was taking the piss?

  ‘Sasha’s in the kitchen,’ he said, disappearing into the front room, the one with the piano and the piles of books. Karina looked longingly after him as if she might follow, but I tugged her towards the back of the house.

  ‘Come on. Don’t worry, you’ll see him again later.’

  ‘I’m not bothered,’ she said, although I don’t know why she even tried to pretend. She was like a dog on heat. I hoped she wasn’t going to do anything embarrassing in front of Sasha.

  In the kitchen, Sasha was sitting with her back to us at the kitchen table with a glass of red wine. All the other girls I’d seen so far were in jeans or tiny denim skirts and skimpy tops, but Sasha was wearing a full-length black dress, cut high at the front but sweeping very low at the back, so that the silken rope of her hair tumbled down her bare, tanned back. She should have looked comically overdressed, but she didn’t. She looked magnificent, making the others look like silly little girls. Leo Smith sat opposite her, facing the door from the hall, but he didn’t even look up when we came in. Sasha looked round when she heard the door, though, and jumped up to greet us. Her feet were bare, toenails painted a vivid scarlet. She hugged me first and then Karina.

  ‘I’m so glad to see you both.’ Her genuine delight was like a spoonful of warm honey. I’d never felt so important, so wanted, so good about myself. ‘What do you want to drink?’

  ‘Do they let you drink, then? Your par – I mean, godparents?’ Karina gaped as Sasha opened the fridge to reveal bottles of beer neatly lined up on their sides and a door full of white wine.

  ‘Oh yes, they’re frightfully liberal, aren’t they, Sash?’ said someone behind us. We turned to see Daniel leaning against the kitchen table, sparkling with amusement.

  ‘Achingly so,’ she said, smiling and pulling a bottle of wine from the fridge. ‘No spirits, though. Although I’m sure some of the “older boys” may have brought some.’

  ‘Did you get a lecture on older boys and how to avoid them?’ said Daniel, laughing.

  ‘I may have done,’ she said. ‘And on that note, we’ll see you later. Come on, girls.’ She grabbed three plastic glasses from the side and swept from the room, Karina and I following in her wake. Daniel looked after her with a smile on his face.

  Upstairs, Tony was tiptoeing across the landing from the bathroom back to what I guessed was his and Olivia’s bedroom.

  ‘Sorry, sorry.’ He held his hands up in a pantomime of apology. ‘Just had to use the facilities. I promise it’ll be the last time you see me. You’re all looking very lovely, ladies,’ he said, giving a little bow. ‘Have a great night.’ He slipped into the bedroom and closed the door.

  Karina shot me a meaningful glance and I remembered how she had swooned over him the day they moved in. I shook my head, trying to warn her not to say anything. It would be too weird in front of Sasha. She must have got the message because she smiled and followed Sasha into her room.

  We sat on the bed sipping our wine. Karina was forcing it down, clearly struggling to stop her face from betraying her inexperience at drinking.

  ‘You seem to be getting on well,’ I said to Sasha.

  ‘Who?’

  ‘You and Daniel. Last time you seemed a bit funny with each other.’

  ‘Oh, that. Yeah, he’s OK, I suppose.’

  ‘What about the other one?’ Karina asked.

  ‘Nick? He’s OK too. They’re fine.’

  We waited for her to say more.

  ‘What?’ she said, looking from me to Karina, bemused. ‘Do you fancy them or something? Why do you want to talk about them all the time?’

  ‘No!’ we said in unison.

  ‘I think it’s…’ Karina halted, and I could feel her anxiety not to give away our summer of stalking. ‘It’s strange, that’s all,’ she said. ‘You were living with your mum, and then all of a sudden you’re in this new family with these two boys, and they’re not your brothers, so…’

  Sasha shrugged. ‘It’s fine. There’s nothing to say.’

  ‘But you must…’ Did I dare say this? She never mentioned her mother. I screwed up my courage. ‘You must miss your mum.’

  Sasha pulled her knees up to her chest, her bare feet getting tangled in the folds of her dress. ‘Yeah, I do,’ she said quietly.

  No one said anything for a while. Karina and I sipped our wine as if our lives depended upon it.

  ‘Are you going to see her soon?’ Karina ventured.

  ‘Yes,’ said Sasha, brightening up. ‘She’s coming over from LA next week to see me.’

  ‘Oh, great. Maybe we could meet her?’ I said, made bold by the wine.

  ‘Maybe,’ Sasha said. ‘She’s not here for long, though, and we’ll probably want to spend the time together.’

  ‘Right.’

  Silence fell again, and I groped in my mind for an easier topic. We fell back on bitching about the teachers and the other kids at school. We were laughing about this boy in our class who no one had ever seen out of school and whether he even existed at all, when the door opened and Leo’s face appeared. Karina’s hands flew to her hair and even I pulled my top down where it had ruched up to show an inch of unappealing belly fat. Sasha was the only one totally unmoved.

  ‘Can we help you?’ she said, frost in every syllable.

  ‘We’re going to play truth, kiss or dare,’ he said, grinning, apparently oblivious to her coolness. ‘Want to join us?’

  Karina was up and off the bed before anyone had even replied.

  ‘Seriously?’ Sasha said, eyebrows raised.

  Karina sank back down, clearly thinking if she moved slowly enough, no one would notice how over-keen she had been.

  ‘Oh, come on, it might be fun,’ I said, throwing Karina a bone. She was supposed to be my best friend, after all.

  ‘Yeah, might be,’ she said gratefully.

  ‘Oh God, OK,’ said Sasha theatrically. She stood up and threw back the remains of her wine. ‘Don’t blame me if it all goes to shit, though.’

  Leo practically jogged along the landing ahead of us, looking back every now and then to make sure we were still behind him. We followed him down the stairs and into the front room. A boy with long dark hair and acne was sitting on the piano stool playing the guitar, a couple of girls gazing on adoringly. I’ve noticed that a boy can be as unattractive as he likes but if he can play the guitar, it ups his fanciability by the power of about a thousand.

  Most of the partygoers were now gathered in this room, sitting in a loose circle on sofas, chairs or the floor. I didn’t recognise a lot of them, so I assumed they were Daniel and Nicholas’s friends. There were a few of Leo’s friends from school, and a few girls from our year who I knew by sight but had never spoken to. I didn’t know who had invited them. An empty beer bottle lay on the floor in the centre of the room.

  �
�OK everyone, let’s start,’ said Leo, who seemed to be in charge. I wondered if he had come up with the idea for the game purely as an opportunity to kiss Sasha.

  Karina, Sasha and I squeezed on to one end of a huge, shabby sofa with a curlicued pattern of leaves and birds on it. My head was starting to swim from the wine and I guessed Karina’s would be too. She was no more used to drinking than I was.

  ‘We’ll go round in a circle,’ Leo went on. ‘You have to choose truth, kiss or dare. Then we’ll spin the bottle and whoever it lands on has to come up with the question, or the dare. Or tell you who to kiss.’

  There were a few groans and mutters from around the room, and a lot of chat and laughter. I could feel the excitement pulsing out of Karina on my right, and a sort of weary indifference from Sasha to my left. I was somewhere in between.

  ‘OK,’ said Leo. ‘I’ll spin the bottle to decide where we start.’ He gave it a great twist and it skidded, spinning round, getting slower and slower. My heart rose in my mouth as I thought it was going to be me, but it ground to a gentle halt pointing straight at Karina, who put her hand to her mouth, half-laughing, half plainly terrified.

  ‘OK!’ Leo said. ‘Karina, is it? Come on, into the middle.’

  Karina scrambled to her feet, her cheeks glowing red, and took her place in the centre of the circle, amid whoops and wolf whistles. Sasha had a tight smile on her face, but she looked anxious.

  ‘Are you OK?’ I whispered.

  ‘Yeah, but… I don’t want her to make a fool of herself, you know?’ she said under her breath. ‘She’s pretty pissed already.’

  ‘What’s it going to be?’ said Leo in the manner of a TV talk show host.

  ‘Um… truth,’ said Karina.

  ‘OK, I’ll spin again,’ said Leo. ‘Whoever it lands on gets to choose the question.’

  He spun the bottle again. This time, it came to rest on one of Leo’s mates from school, a thickset, dark-haired boy called Alex. Leo flung himself down in the space next to Alex, as if better to enjoy the show. Nicholas was on his other side and they exchanged a couple of remarks, laughing together as if they were old friends, although I didn’t think they’d ever met before tonight.

  They were interrupted by Alex’s question. ‘Are you a virgin?’

  The pink that already stained Karina’s cheeks darkened to red and spread down her neck and across her chest. This was the worst question she could have been asked. I knew she was, and everyone from our school probably had a good idea too and would know if she was lying. It was a fine line anyway. Say yes and you were naïve, unsophisticated, childish; say no and you were a slag. I willed her to get on with it. The longer she stood there, the worse it would be for her.

  After what felt like hours, she spoke, muttering a low ‘Yes’ and slinking back to her seat next to me, shame burning from her like fire. I had little time to worry about her, though, because now it was my go. I took my place in the centre, my heart racing.

  ‘So, what’s it to be?’ said Leo, standing up and joining me. The light from the lamp in the corner caught his eyes and they glittered in the dimness. I’d been skipping from one to the other in my mind during Karina’s turn. My main fear about choosing dare was that I might have to take off some of my clothes, which would be beyond humiliating; and having witnessed Karina’s question, I didn’t fancy truth either. Kiss was probably the lesser of the three evils, so I took a shaky breath.

  ‘I’ll take kiss,’ I said, aiming for nonchalance.

  There was a chorus of ‘oohs’ and whistles.

  ‘She’s gone for kiss, ladies and gentlemen,’ said Leo, getting into his role now. ‘OK, I’ll spin the bottle and whoever it lands on chooses who she kisses. Here we go.’ He spun once more. This time the bottle caught on the carpet and didn’t spin far, stopping on Daniel, who rubbed his hands together in glee.

  ‘Hmmm, I think you can kiss… my dear brother Nicky!’

  Nicholas groaned and put his head in his hands, then quickly looked up at me and said, ‘Sorry, no offence, nothing personal. It’s… well, thanks, Dan. And it’s Nicholas, or Nick, if you must, not Nicky.’ He jabbed his brother with his elbow and stood up.

  ‘Aaah, Nicky’s first kiss!’ said Daniel, falling about laughing.

  ‘Fuck off,’ said Nicholas, shooting him an evil look.

  ‘Don’t forget the tongues, now!’ trilled Leo. ‘That’s the rules!’

  ‘What rules? You never said anything about rules!’ protested Nicholas as he walked towards me.

  ‘I’m saying it now,’ said Leo, pushing me against Nicholas’s chest.

  Nicholas looked at me and raised his eyebrows. ‘OK, here goes,’ he said, bending towards me. His lips met mine, surprisingly soft and warm. My stomach flipped over as his tongue slipped into my mouth. It was only the second time I’d ever kissed a boy. At Tamara Gregg’s party last summer, I’d been talking to a boy she knew from Venture Scouts. He’d unexpectedly loomed down at me mid-conversation, enclosing my entire mouth in his and lunging at it repeatedly and violently, his teeth grazing my skin. My lips were so sore the next day I felt like I’d been punched in the mouth. This was completely different, gentle and caressing, and my mouth opened in response, my body arching towards him. A loud wolf whistle brought me to my senses and I pulled back, blushing, and returned to my seat. Sasha’s hand slipped into mine and I squeezed back. Thank God that was over.

  Leo looked at Sasha triumphantly. She released my hand and sauntered casually into the middle, her dress flowing over her curves like water.

  ‘The lovely Sasha,’ said Leo. ‘So, what’ll it be?’

  ‘Truth,’ she said, looking him straight in the eye.

  ‘OK,’ he said, trying not to sound disappointed that she hadn’t picked kiss, what with him being in charge of the spinning bottle. ‘Truth it is.’ He spun, and once again the bottle landed on his mate Alex. Everyone looked at Alex, but I kept looking at Leo, who raised his eyebrows at Alex, pointing at himself, wanting Alex to ask Sasha if she liked him, I suppose. But Alex had a one-track mind tonight (and possibly every night), and again he came out with his question with no hesitation.

  ‘Do you masturbate?’

  There was a second of shocked silence, then horrified laughter from the girls and whooping from the boys. I looked at Sasha, desperately sorry for her that she had to face such humiliation, but she simply smiled and said casually, ‘Of course. All the time.’

  As she sat back down, I looked around to see how this bombshell had gone down. The girls were still giggling and whispering to each other, but the boys… I thought what she had admitted to was embarrassing, but they were all looking at her with naked, unashamed desire.

  The game went on, with various permutations of truth, kiss and dare being acted out. When it got to Daniel’s turn, he chose kiss, and the bottle stopped at Nicholas.

  ‘Kiss Sasha,’ Nicholas said.

  ‘Hang on a minute, they’re related,’ said Leo.

  ‘No they’re not, you idiot,’ said Nicholas. ‘Mum and Dad are her godparents.’

  Leo looked in alarm from one to the other, trying to come up with another reason, but in the end, Daniel stood up, motioning Sasha to do the same. In the centre, he bent and kissed her lightly and briefly on the lips. They held eye contact for a moment, and then both sat back down.

  ‘Hey!’ said Nick. ‘He said the rule was tongues. You can’t do that.’

  ‘I can do whatever the fuck I like,’ said Daniel.

  ‘Let’s move on,’ said Leo hastily. ‘Who’s next?’

  As Nicholas glowered at Daniel, I caught a movement outside in the hall, out of the corner of my eye. For a confusing moment I thought it was Daniel, but he was still there across the circle, watching Sasha. When I looked back, there was no one there. Intrigued, I told Sasha and Karina I was going to the toilet, and went out into the hall. A man was making his way up the stairs, scurrying as if he’d been caught out. At the sound of my feet on the parquet floor, he stop
ped and looked back. Seeing me, he smiled and raised a finger to his lips.

  ‘I wasn’t here,’ he said. ‘You never saw me.’

  It was Tony Monkton.

  Ellen

  September 2017

  Back at the flat, I can’t stop seeing Karina’s face, guarded and hostile. I could still see in her the girl who used to be my best friend, but only just. I pray Dilys is right, that this is another case of Karina seeing Daniel where he is not, everywhere she goes, like I used to. I know it’s not, though. Something tells me that this time, he is back.